wear high heels and get a record deal.

Official NEW obsession

1. swimming laps- lets go Cay !
2. hanging mobiles-so calming

Arggghhh.
The notifications on Facebook have been piling up, no joke.
So lazy ):
And the only messages I get are from the Zouk thing and it's not like I can go anyway.
Oh jkdhsfkjbwuegtwjhg!

x

It's 1 in the am I'm supposed to be in bed.
I will I will in a minute.
Was supposed to go for a jog but I fell back asleep,sorry sweetie hehe!
Today was surprisingly very very productive.Weeeell kinda.
Got up and got dressed. Followed mummy to the small Giant in Kelana Jaya.
We were getting some things to donate to the nearby orphanage.
Yes the orphanage not the old folks home but they're run by the same management
(inside thing)
Some St Johns' were there. Odd jobbing I reckon.
When we got to the car, a rather aged man approached me.
He was carrying an umbrella under the merciless heat.
His clothes were worn and tattered and his face showed that he was so tired, his silver hair limp and dry in the Sun.
"Amoi saya letak balik untuk kamu ya, boleh kasih satu ringgit ya amoi, uncle mahu beli teh,"

(Little girl I'll put this back for you okay? Can I have a ringgit please. I want to buy tea.")

I smiled politely and fished out the only amount of money I could give, one ringgit.
I was frantically trying to look for a tenner, a fiver at least but to no avail. While searching the metal on my indian beaded bracelet scratched my skin, I felt the blood ooze lightly and the hot air stinging the cut.
His eyes still on me spoke kind words through his shy gaze. He didn't mind just that one ringgit.
I handed him the note and said "Sorry uncle sikit saja"

(I'm sorry uncle, the amount isn't much)

"Tak apa amoi. Amoi sangat baik hati"

(It's okay little girl you are very kind)

He thanked me and pushed the cart back, you know the ones that you have to put twenty cents in.
His smile, brimming with gratitude,plastered into my thoughts.

I know for a fact that most of us are pretty well to do.
If you drop your twenty cent coin on the floor and it's rolled somewhere how many of us would actually want to pick it up.
I know some people who pretend they didn't see it and they won't pick it up.
They say "Aiyoh so little la. nothing to buy also"

Twenty cents does contain value but nowadays not so much.
A fiver or tenner most of us could finish it in a day.
A pen, eraser, exercise book, nasi lemak, wantan, coke in the canteen, maybe an ice cream after school.
Then the mamak with friends and back to school a stop at 7-11 for a magazine and maybe a tube on mentos.
There it's gone.
It's not that we don't value money but it's hardly much anymore.
Nothing to be ashamed only the honest truth.
But to these people a five ringgit or ten ringgit note could feed themselves for a week, or a family for a few days.
When I was about nine, I clearly remember asking my father

"Papa how much do you make?"

He smiled and carried me
"Enough for us to be happy sayang why do you ask?"

"Nothing but papa why doesn't everyone make money like you?"

How could he put it into simple sentences for me to understand.

"Well sayang they didn't study hard enough and thats why people will only pay them maybe like for example 20 cents,"

Wide eyed and confused I scrunched my eyebrows and asked
"Twenty cents. Why so little?"

"Well sayang if the man will only pay him twenty cents what are you going to do because you cannot qualify for anything higher,"

I may have been only nine years old but I understood his words, crystal clear.
From that day on I learned the importance of money.
I may be seen as thrifty as times or spend thrift at others but I still manage my money well.

The old silver haired man pushed the cart back and retrieved the coin he carefully placed it into his pocket and slowly lugged himself to find another persons cart.
The pain I felt blocked out the sting I had from the cut.
My heart felt heavy and uneasy.
I strapped myself into the seat and wondered, does he have a family?
Where does it stay?
Does he have children and if so where are they?
Has he eaten?
Will he eat?
My mother stroked my lifeless hands and said

"It's okay. I know how you feel okay? Remember to always thank God for what you have and help those in need, God will bless those who are kind and giving. One day when you are older you will able to do more, right now we will do the best we can,"

I looked into my mothers eyes, through her brown tinted Gucci sunglasses.
Her dark eyes matched mine.
Dark brown and brimming with tears.
Whenever I go there the same thing happens again and again but I will never chase them away or neglect them I will try to help them however I can.

We stopped at the orphanage.
The caretaker took to things and thanked us

"Thank you so much girl thank you"

The little children smiled and said thank you.
One little girl in a pink dress with hypnotic eyes smiled.
She was so small and so pretty.
Thank you she whispered.
Leaving, she went to the gate and waved goodbye.


One day I will make a difference.